Home alone AT LAST. Dad, Mom, Kathryn and Brandy have gone out to catch a movie at the Multiplex. Recalling how the last Skarr-family-movie-session went, I backed out of the expedition. An extremely wise call, if you ask me.
So now I’m waiting for House to start while sneaking handfuls of popcorn into my mouth as I write this.
This is THE LIFE!!
What could be better than having a Brandy-free evening ahead of you AND the prospect of blankly staring at the idiot box as well??
And, OK, there are lots of better things to do than the aforesaid [like having your math teacher absent for even a day], but this s about the closest thing to bliss I am going to get around here. Take it or leave it.
You know what?? Except for the “Pee-Her-Pants Girl” scandal and the torture I had to go through while attempting to sleep on the couch that night, Brandy hasn’t been THAT bad. And while most cousins don’t post monstrous snapshots of their elders on widely used social networking sites, she’s actually been behaving… decently.
According to Brandy standards, of course.
She hasn’t even had a major tantrum in, what, TWO WHOLE DAYS?? That’s got to be some sort of record. Brandy NEVER goes more than an hour without screaming her butt off for the most frivolous of demands.
Which makes me wonder what on EARTH that girl is up to. Because Brandy isn’t on her best behaviour for nothing. I know her too well to be able for THAT trick.
So WHAT?? What does she want?? What does she wish for SO MUCH that she hasn’t yelled herself hoarse already for??
It has to be something MASSIVE. Because if it was an ordinary request, she could’ve asked for it without doing this to herself [not being wicked for forty-eight hours, I mean].
Does she want my parents to sponsor her trip to the moon because her own Mom has run out of liquid assets thanks to spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on her daughter per month?? [Nope, I don’t think so. I mean, if there aren’t at least fifty million shopping stores there, count her out. Why do you think she takes the trouble and effort of coming to stay with US annually?? Not because she so enjoys our company, but because of the Dior next door]
Does she want my Dad to quit his job and become her official piggy-back-ride-giver?? [NO WAY. If the vehicle doesn’t cost more than a European country –which my Dad isn’t worth. At least, not to HER-, then NO WAY is Brandy going to be seen dead in it]
Does she want me to –horror!- give up my ROOM?? [I can’t see this happening in EVER. My chamber doesn’t have single diamond-encrusted walk-in closet, which is a BASIC essential for Brandy. How can she live in a place that doesn’t even contain a jewel-studded cupboard??]
Then WHAT?? If she doesn’t want a rocket or my father’s back or my room, WHAT COULD SHE POSSIBLY-
I’m going to have to hold that thought because House has just started and nothing is more important than catching up on your favourite serials. At least, that’s what I think.